Obviously I haven't gotten this subject mastered. After all, I'm still single! Women are truely a mystery to me. I hear that they want COMMITMENT, but every girl I've wanted to commit ends up saying that,"I'm not interested in that." Girls claim the want a NICE GUY. Well, a quote from the philosopher's Green Day, "Nice guys finish last" reminds me of how untrue that statement is. Maybe it's the choice in women I decide to date, or maybe it's because I'm a baffling idiot! In either case, I'm still doing something wrong.
I guess I'm really just sick of the "games" that people play. I'm interested in something a lot more. Yeah, I'm talking about that serious relationship thing. The thing that freaks out people and causes their stomach's to turn. Well, I feel that I'm ready, now if I can only find the other part that makes this work.
I think one of my biggest problems about first dates is the fact that you have to on your best behaviour. After all, the first impression is the most important one. The problem for me is that I'm too busy focusing on being perfect that it overshadow's who you truely are. Normally I am an entertaining person (so I'm told), but when trying to cast that almighty first impression, I find myself limiting and restraining from being myself. I am also so overrun by nervousness that I often turn into that blumbering idiot who wants to slap himself after some of the stupid things I say.
Why do I bring all this up? Well, it just so happens that I can relate all this to a recent event. Last Wednesday I was finally introduced to a lovely girl that I've been interested in meeting for a few months now. I was so intimidated with meeting her because there would be no way a complete stranger would have the same feelings I was already dragging in. She agreed to have lunch with me which was really cool, but instead of feeling relaxed and collected, I was a blabbering moron! If it were any other stranger, I probably would have just been myself and it would have turned out alright. To make a long story short, I'm still wondering if she is even REMOTELY interested in me.
This brings up another point, trying to figure out what the other person is thinking. Sometimes I feel like a 4 star General trying to figure out what the enemy is plotting next. I often find myself analyzing the situation to death, trying to figure out what that comment meant or what that reaction was really implying. Maybe that's what makes me good at my job, analyzing things to death! I wonder why I can't just take things as they are, like NORMAL people probably do!
To sum it up, I like this new girl. I think she is really interesting, highly intelligent and very attractive. Would I see go out with her, HECK YEAH! Would she see me again...er...
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